Our dirt bikes bring all the boys to the yard. Damn right, they're better than yours.

Thursday, December 08, 2005

Ooh! Ooh! I wanna play!

I'm liking this whole reminiscing about how retarded we were when we were young thing, so I thought I'd contribute. Unfortunately, I think my old diaries from elementary school and junior high are still at my parents' house (which reminds me, I should probably get those sometime—my parents really don't need to be reading about how some guy I slow-danced with in grade eight "totally had a boner!!!!!") I did, however, bring a big box of notes that I've collected over the years from friends with me when I moved out. So as not to embarrass people I still know and who read this blog occasionally, I picked one from elementary school. This is from this girl Meredith who spent about ten years of her life dedicated to ruining mine until we stopped being friends in high school. As far as I know, she's an unsuccessful model living in Toronto now. THERE'S YOUR COMEUPPPENCE, BITCH!!!

Anyway, this is verbatim:

"Dear Kris,
So how life? That's how I always start my letters!
Well that was soooo rude of Erica not to come over! Well Let's do something like me, you and Anne go to fantasyland oops sorry I mean Galaxyland or maybe the Waterpark. I'd rather go to Galaxylaxy (?) Land, because some of the rides I've never gone on like the orbitron, the thing that goes around and your in the carts. The thing Erica got hit in the tooth with a loose screw. And the swing of the Century. I might go on the Mindbender it looks fun!
Well I just finished baby-sitting my cousin Luc.
Well your a really good friend see:

My top 5 friends
1. Tamara
2. Kris
3. Erica
4. Jenny (3 and 4 switch sometimes)
5. Lisa

Well this is a private letter! Don't show anyone! Well get back to me on Galaxyland or Waterpark. Here is a Quiz on the Next Page!

1. If your boyfriend dumped you for your bestfriend you would:
a) throw a tantrum
b) tell her your friendship is over.
c) cry, cry and cry
d) tell her you'll get over it someday

2. You've been going out with your boyfriend for a long time and you are in love with him. The more your together the more cute things you notice about him one day he just dumps you. You:
a) shrug and say "oh well I guess it's your loss."
b) complain to all your friends
c) sit in front of the t.v. and pig out
d) give him an evil glare in school as you walk past his locker.

3. When you go out with your boyfriend lately your boyfriend says he forgot his wallet. So instead of paying half you keep picking up the tab. You:
a) invite him to the movies and pretend you forgot your wallet
b) buy him a wallet chain for his Birthday
c) tell him your not convinced and tell him hes putting a magor dent in your purse

4. You've been crazy for a guy since you first laid eyes on him and he's asked you out. He's a great date, so at the end of the date you:
a) say good-night and rush inside before he could say anything else
b) stall on the door step hoping for a kiss goodnight
c) give him a kiss before he has the choice of giving you one.

Well thats all just quiz back A.S.A.P.!

From your pal,

P.S. I hope you like your Duck!"

Keep in mind we were in elementary school when she wrote this, so all the references to "boyfriends" and "wallets" and "lockers" are purely hypothetical. I think my favourite part is when she tells me I'm not her best friend.

Anyway, I expect responses to this quiz from all of you so I can analyze your, uh, dating style.


Blogger Superdude said...

My answers are a, b,m a d, 4, and Appotamox.

As for the questions, I don't really know how I'd treat my boyfriend if he didn't kiss me after our date. I'd probably thank him, punch him in the shoulder, talk about football for a while, then go in the house and jack off so violently I'd need stitches.

8:20 PM


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