Our dirt bikes bring all the boys to the yard. Damn right, they're better than yours.

Sunday, February 05, 2006

As seen in TO

As an editor, I've seen a lot of "wrong" words in my time, but man, that is one surprisingly wrong word. In fact, it's made even more wrong by the curious rightness of every other word that surrounds it. I mean, why didn't the sign person say anything while they were making it? Someone could have put a stop to this at some point in the process from conception to creation, but no. Here it is. Unuathorifed.

I saw this on Bathurst Street today as I was strolling down to Kensington Market after I went and handed in an application for an apartment in the Annex area. Looked really nice when I checked it out—big bedroom, very character, all hardwood and new fixtures, plus a dishwasher—and at $1000 a month, the price is actually quite reasonable given the area. So yeah.

My stroll didn't last long, though, as shortly after I took this picture the torrential rain that holds Toronto in its clammy grasp even I write this first started to fall, so I ducked into a little diner and had a club sandwich. It was good. The accompanying cole slaw was homemade and the waitress was a very old and weathered Jewish lady who never wrote anything down and just yelled all her orders into the kitchen. It was a tight ship. (Speaking of side dishes, I had lunch in Little Korea yesterday and my beef bulgogi meal came with all the usual Korean fixin's, plus macaroni salad. Like, most likely taken directly from a KFC Family Pack macaroni salad. As though they were worried that the supplied mountain of beef, rice, pickled bean sprouts, kim chee and tofu and soy sauce would seem inadequate just on its own.)

Anyhow, Toronto is weird but beautiful, and even a little humbling. It's going to take some getting used to, but I think I like it. And I enjoy my job and co-workers far more than my cynicism would have ever let me suspect a week ago, so that's awesome, too. But more to come at some future date, I guess. How's that for a cliffhanger, fuckos?


Blogger Dan-O-Mite said...

Rain isn't normal for the beginning of Feb in Toronto is it? Ah global warming ...

I'm glad that you're having a good time over in—what are the kids calling it?—the tee dot. When I was there it seemed way cooler than I thought it was going to be. More fun than dreary old Edmonton.

2:02 AM

Anonymous collin said...

Here, I'll use it in a sentence: The histories of many models remain unauthorified because automotive writers play favourites.
In other news, somewhat pertaining to made-up words, I've been invited to be a celebrity contestant in the Medicine Hat Library Scrabble (TM) championship.
Zee you later.

12:59 PM

Blogger Dave said...

I believe to "Thorify" something is to make it more like Thor. Like, if you were to put a cape and a little horned helmet on your dog, it would be Thorified.
Perhaps this sign should read "Unthorified cars will be towed," meaning that only cars with chrome wings, doors wrapped in leather strips and the ability to fire stone hammers at other cars are allowed to park there.

And celeb Scrabble championship judge -- sounds wild! Wild enough to write a blog post about, in fact. As your second post it surely would be worth double word score.

12:17 PM

Anonymous C-O-L-L-I-N said...

Scrabble-wise, I'm expecting a lot of cheating. The cop reporter did it last year and said the filthy bluehairs get their way. I'll have to get hardcore against the spinsters.
Anyway... sounds like Toronto offers a plethora of dining experience for the young, hip wordsmith. Enjoy your kim chee. Sigh.

2:52 PM

Blogger Kristine said...

I hate to disappoint you guys, but the sign says "UnuathoriFED," not "UnuathroFIED." Also: blogs! It sure has been a while since I've checked this crazy thing out. Because, you know, I'm so busy single-handedly trying to keep Edmonton rad.


5:40 PM

Anonymous Steve-Dave said...

single-handedly? *cough*

I think not, lady.

4:54 PM


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